Favorite TV Quotes

[savery]

The Vampire Diaries Quotes


Vikki: I know you.

Damon: Well, that's unfortunate.

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Damon: *To Stefan* Not bad. Have you been eating bunnies?

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Stefan: What are you up to, Damon?

Damon: That's for me to know and for you to ...

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Damon: You're my little brother and if you want to live a normal, happy, human, life. Then I want that for you. Maybe I can do it to. I can learn to be a non-living, living, person.

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Damon: I saw Elena today. B.T.W. That means, by the way.

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Damon: *To Zach* Just going through Stefan's homework. Boy this country has dumbed down in the last hundred years. Why he wants to go to high school is beyond me. Harvard I understood. Actually, no, I didn't get that either.

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Damon: It's cool not growing old. I like being the eternal stud.

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Damon: *To Tyler* You. Don't talk.

Tyler: Screw you, dude!

Damon: Dude? Really? Dude?

Stefan: Damon, don't.

Damon: Oh, come on, who's going to miss this idiot?

***************************************************

Damon: Stefan smiles. Alert the media.

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Damon: Does it get tiring being so self-riteous?

Elena: It flares up in the prescence of psychopaths.

Damon: Ouch. Well, consider this psychopath's feelings hurt.

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Damon: I got the town off our back. It was for the greater good. But I'm sorry. And to prove it I am not going to feed on a human for at least a... week.

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Damon: Are you mimicking me?

Stefan: Yes, Stefan, I can go back to my rountine of how I can destroy Stefan's life this week.

Damon: And I can go back to sulking. And Elena-longing. And forehead brooding. This is fun. I like this.

****************************************************

Stefan: So, Stefan, I think we should start over.

Damon: I don't, Damon. I can't trust you to be a nice guy. You kill everybody and you're so mean. You're so mean.... You're really hard to imitate.

**************************************************

Damon: *Mimicking Stefan* That's just like you, Damon. Always have to have the last word.

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Damon: I have a diabolical plan.

Lexi: What is it?

Damon: Well, if I told you it woldn't be very diabolical, now would it?

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Elena: This is kidnapping.

Damon: That's a little melodramtic, don't you think?

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Bonnie: You tried to kill me.

Damon: But I didn't. And if I wanted to I could have. Does that not count for anything?

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Damon: If I see something I have not seen before I will throw a dollar at it.

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Stefan: They took Elena.

Damon: Yeah. I got that from your 600 voicemails.

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Damon: We haven't met.

Matt: I'm Matt.

Damon: Well, then, there's a reason we haven't met.

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Elena: You don't understand.

Damon: Oh, I understand. I understand. He's the reason you live. His love lifts you up where you belong.

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Damon: *To Alaric* Oh, don't look at me like that. I know you hate me. But guess what? Everyone hates me. But you can't deny that we were BADASS!

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Damon: *To Stefan* Could you turn it up a little bit? It's not annoying.... YET.

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Damon: No, Elena, I will not go to your bedroom with you!

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Elena: How long is it gonna take for him to go back to normal?

Damon: A few days. Give or take.

Elena: It's been a few days.

Damon: All right. Give then.

****************************************************

Stefan: I really liked you a whole lot better when you hated everybody.

Damon: Oh, I still do. I just love that they love me.

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Damon: *To Elena* Have I entered an alternate universe where Stefan is actually fun?

****************************************************

Damon: Do you want to hear the bad news or the really bad news?

Stefan: Actually, I don't want any news, Damon.

Damon: All right, let me rephrase, do you want to hear how the council is back in vampire mode or how I just killed uncle John Gilbert?

****************************************************

John: Hi, partner. You haven't returned any of my calls.

Damon: Most people would take that as a hint.

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Alaric: Hi, it's Alaric Slatzman.

Damon: Ok, before I hang up, how did you get this number?

Alaric: It's in the street.

Damon: You tried to kill me.

Alaric: Yeah, well, you did kill me. *Hangs up*

****************************************************

Alaric: Can we not kill anyone tonight, please?

Damon: So, you just brought me along for my company?

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Damon: *To Alaric* Sorry I'm late. Dog at my.... Nevermind.

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Damon: *To Alaric* Stefan's different. He wants to live every episode of How I Met Your Mother.

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Damon: I like being a living dead person.

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Damon: You have no sense of humor, Stefan.

Stefan: Actually, I just have no sense of Damon humor.

Damon: Damon humor?

****************************************************

Mayor: What're you doing here?

Damon: I'm a vampire. What's your excuse?

[Hannah G.]

Finn: You know what we should do?
Rachel: Elope?
Finn: What?
JOURNEY

Will: Inside, you're a really good person. I appreciate what you're doing for these kids. I won't forget it.
Sue: I'm seriously gonna puke in your mouth.

Will: I love you, Emma. And you love me. Dentist or no, this thing isn't over between us (Favorite Wemma quote)

Quinn: Did you love me?
Puck: Yes. Especially now.
(Favorite Quick quote)

Rachel: Break a leg.
Finn: I love you.
(Favorite Finchel quote)

Sue: Your hair looks like a briar patch. I keep expecting racist, animated Disney characters to pop up and start singing about living on the bayou

FUNK

Sue: Will I'm not going to do this. Even your breath stinks of mediocrity

Rachel: Now I just keep having nightmares of all of the mother's of the little baby chicks coming at me for revenge.

Terri: I have this compulsive need to crush other people's dreams.
Finn: Yeah that's what Mr. Shu said

Quinn (on regrets): Thinking "trust me" was a sensible birth control option

Sue: You know, for me trophies are like herpes. You can try to get rid of them but they just keep coming. Sue Sylvester has hourly flair ups of burning itchy highly contagious talent

Artie: They call it a funkification, meaning they show us what they've got and we spiral into a deep cloud of funk

Theatricality

Puck: While Jackie Daniels is a great name for a power boat or something, it's not great for a baby girl.

Rachel: When I was little and I was sad, my dads would bring me a glass of water. It got to a point where I didn't know if I was sad or thirsty.

Tina: I know who I am and I'm not allowed to show it. It's like Communism.

Tina: My mom won't even let me watch Twilight. She says she thinks Kristen Stewart seems like a bitch

Figgins: American teens are coming down with an enormous case of Twilight fever (haha Twihards)

DREAM ON

Artie: I'm never gonna dunk a basketball or kill a lion. I need to focus on dreams I can make come true.

Bryan: You ever heard of the term anger sex?
Sue: The only kind I know
Bryan: Should I lock the door?
Sue: No, I've got a secret room upstairs. Like Letterman

Rachel: I came in first place.
Jesse: You were eight months old.
Rachel: I was very musically verbal.

Bryan: Dont make that face. Global warming is a theory.

LARYNGITIS

Sue: I'll have to take to the mic and deliver a diatribe. Probably something about immigrants

Sue: Nobody quits the Cheerios. You either die or I kick you off

Kurt: I need you to respect my privacy. Brittany and I were just having sexual relations

Kurt: I'm not a box. There are more than four sides to me (Favorite Kurt line)

Sue: So you like show tunes. It doesn't mean you're gay. It just means you're awful.

Puck: I feel like that guy who lost all his hair, then lost all his hair.
Santana : Samson?
Puck : Agassi

Puck: get ready black girl from Glee club whose name I can't remember right now. The Puckster is about to make you his

Rachel: I have chosen Miley Cyrus' "The Climb" because it's about overcoming obstacles and beating the odds. In my case, the obstacle is you: my lackluster teammates who refuse to carry their own weight

BAD REPUTATION

Sue: I might buy a small diaper for your chin, because it looks like a baby's ass

Quinn: You're a really good teacher, even if everyone is calling you a man whore

Sue: Some people like to film themselves getting physical with their partner. I happen to enjoy revisiting the impeccable form of my jazzercise routines

Mercedes: Why does everyone assume I'm angry all the time? It's called being sassy.

Emma: You're a slut, Will. You're a slut, you're a slut. Everyone should know that

Jesse: You guys need to stop being such asses and start being bad asses

Student: Hey, Ms. Sylvester, let's get physical.
Sue: Not really my type, but I like that attitude.

HOME

Kurt: Can you go now? I'm a half hour behind on my moisturizer routine, and I need to wake up early

Will: The liquor cabinet is off limits.
April: No worries. I brought my own

Kurt: You have a week to lose 10 pounds. It's like trying to lose one of my butt cheeks

Sue: I will no longer be carrying around photo ID. Know why? People should know who I am.

THE POWER OF MADONNA

Will: You took ownership of your body when you said you didn't wanna sleep with me... and then ran out of my apartment with no shoes on

Jesse: Just come out so we can talk. Or sing about it

Sue: I make fun of Will's hair because I'm jealous. There. I said it

Mercedes: That would make you, like, 30.
Sue: 29

Will: Enough with the hair jokes. By the way, how is the Florence Henderson look working for you

Sue: I thought I smelled cookies from the tears of elves weeping that live in your hair.

Sue: As Madonna once said, I'm tough, I'm ambitious and if that makes me a bitch, that's what I am. Pretty sure she stole that line from Sue Sylvester. No, really. I said it first.

HELL-O

Finn: I want us to be together, a real couple. I even circled some dates on your crazy calendar

Rachel: It will be the kind of heartbreak that girls like me hold for the rest of their lives. Like Barbara in "The Way We Were

Sue: Anything else?
Brittany: Sometimes I forget my middle name

Sue: It's my understanding you've been given the heave-ho by that terribly uncoordinated Finn Hudson

Rachel: Good luck winning without me.
Kurt: Everyone is replaceable, even you

Sue: You may be two of the stupidest teens I've ever encountered - and that's saying something. I once taught a cheerleading seminar to Sarah Palin

Jesse: I've got a full ride to a little school called the University of California in Los Angeles. Maybe you've heard of it. It's in Los Angeles

[♥Heather✰]

haha I love Damon's thats for me to know and you to dot dot dot lmao

[ashley]

time for more same and dean quotes

dean"dude you fugly"

Sam: Dean, there's ten times as much lore about angels as there is about anything else we've ever hunted.
Dean: You know what, there's a ton of lore on unicorns too. In fact, I hear that they ride on silver moonbeams, and that they shoot rainbows out of their ass!
sam: Wait, there's no such thing as unicorns? (sarcastically)

sam: when i told dad I was afraid of what was in my closet he gave me a 45

[♥Heather✰]

My fave is "I'm Batman!" lmao

[ashley]

sam: yeah your batman

[savery]

The Vampire Diaries: Delena Quotes! ;D


Damon: I'd quit cheerleading if I were you.

Elena: Why do you say that?

Damon: Oh, I saw you at practice, you looked miserable.

Elena: You saw that?

Damon: Am I wong?

Elena: I used to love it. It was fun. Things are different this year. Everything that used to matter doesn't anymore.

Damon: So, don't let it. Quit. Move on. Problem solved.

Elena: Some things could matter again.

Damon: Maybe, but it seems unrealistic to me.

Elena: I'm sorry.

Damon: *Sligthly confused*

Elena: About Katherine. You lost her to.

****************************************************

Damon: Hello, Elena.

Jenna: *To Elena* Hi, where have you been? We're cooking dinner.

Damon: *To Elena* Stefan with you?

Elena: Um, he'll be here soon.

*Jenna no longer in the room, Damon purposely walks into Elena*

Elena: Don't do that.

Damon: Do what?

Elena: You know what. That move was deliberate.

Damon: Well, yeah, I was deliberately trying to get to the sink. Speaking of Stefan, where is he? He's missing family night, which I am enjoying immensely. Is it real?

Elena: Is what real?

Damon: This re-newed sense of brotherhood. Can I trust him?

Elena: Yes, you can trust him.

Damon: Can I trust him?

Elena: I'm wearing vervain, Damon, it's not going to work.

Damon: I'm not compelling you. I just want you to answer me honestly.

Elena: Of course you can. For trust you have to give it to get it.

Damon: Are you lecturing me?

Elena: Do you need to be lectured?

Damon: I just want her back. I'm sure you can understand that.

Elena: I can understand that you'd do anything for her, yes.

Damon: Then you will understand what I will do if anyone gets in my way.

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*Elena's car accident she's trapped in the car*

Damon: *Rushes to save her*

Elena: Damon....

Damon: You're stuck.

Elena: It's my seatbelt.

Damon: I'm going to get you out of here. I want you to put your hands on the roof.

Elena: Puts her hands on the roof*

Damon: Just like that. Are you ready? One, two, three. *Gets her out* I gottcha. Are you ok? Can you stand? Is anything broken?

Elena: No.

Damon: *Tries to hold her up* Whoa. You're fainting fast, Elena. *Tries to get her to focus* Elena look at me. Focus. Look at me.

Elena: I look like her. *Passes out*

Damon: *Keeps her from falling completely and walks way with her in his arms*

****************************************************

Damon: Morning.

Elena: Where are we?

Damon: Georgia.

Elena: Georgia? No. No, we're not. Seriously, Damon, where are we?

Damon: Seriously, we're in Georgia. How are you feeling? There was no broken bones. I checked.

Elena: My car.... There was a man. I hit a man. But then he got up. Who was that?

Damon: That's what I would like to know.

Elena: Where's my phone. Ok, we really need to go back. No one knows where I am. Pull over. I mean it, Damon, pull over. Stop the car.

Damon: You were so much more fun when you were asleep. *Pulls over they got out of the car. Damon saves her from falling* Are you ok?

Elena: I'm fine. We have to go back.

Damon: Oh, come on, we've already come this far.

Elena: Why are you doing this? I can't be in Georgia. I-I wrecked my car I have to go home. This is kidnapping.

Damon: That a little melodramtic, don't you think?

Elena: You're not funny. I'm not doing this. I'm not going to Georgia.

Damon: Well, you're in Georgia. Without your magic little necklace I might add. I could very easily make you agreeable.

Elena: What are you trying to prove? *Her phone starts ringing from where it is in Damon's pocket* That's my phone.

Damon: *Gets it out* It's your boyfriend.

Elena: *Shakes her head*

Damon: *Answers it* Elena's phone.

Stefan: Where is she? Why do you have her phone? Is she ok?

Damon: Elena, she's right here. And, yes, she's fine.

Stefan: Where are you? Let me speak to her.

Damon: He wants to talk to you.

Elena: *Shakes her head*

Damon: Yeah, I don't really think she wants to talk to you right now.

Stefan: Damon, I swear to God if you touch her....

Damon: You have a good day. Bye now. *Hangs up*

Elena: Look no one knows where I am. Can we please just go back?

Damon: We're almost there.

Elena: Where is there?

Damon: A little place right outside of Atlanta. Oh, come on, Elena. You don't want to go back right now, do you? What's the rush. Time out. Trust me, your problems are still gonna be there when you get home. Look, step away from you life for five minutes, five minutes.

Elena: Am I gonna be safe with you?

Damon: Yes.

Elena: You promise not to do that mind control thing with me?

Damon: Yes.

Elena: Can I trust you?

Damon: Get in the car.

****************************************************

Elena: Stefan?

Damon: Better. Me.

Elena: You look....

Damon: Dashing? Handsome? Irresistable?

Elena: Wrecked. You look wrecked.

Damon: No reason why. Do you know that I am one Mystic Falls's most eligiable bachelors?

Elena: Huh.

Damon: Yep.

Elena: So, how are you doing?

Damon: Never better. What can I do for you? I'm a barrel of favors today. Even if it's not on purpose. So, how can I help you?

Elena: I'm just meeting Stefan to go to the fundraiser.

Damon: Help a guy out, will you? *Indicating at his shirt* I can't get this.

Elena: *Helps him* So, I found out who my mother mother is.

Damon: Who cares.

Elena: *Gives him a dark look*

Damon: She left you. She sucks.

****************************************************

Elena: But you took a risk with Damon. How did you know he was gonna give it to me?

Isobel: Because he's in love with you.

Damon: *Silence*

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*Stefan and Damon's conversation about Elena*


Damon: Say it. Whatever it is. Get it out.

Stefan: It's about what Isobel said.

Damon: What about it?

Stefan: Well, I know you and Elena have bonded. And I know that she cares about you. And I know you care about her.

Damon: Well, this is going in an interesting direction.

Stefan: I am just concerned about Elena being hurt. She considers you a friend.

Damon: Same here. Elena is a very good friend. Actually, she might qualify as my only friend. Is that a problem?

Stefan: So, with you the risk of sounding like a jealous boyfriend....

Damon: Oh, there is no risk. You do.

Stefan: History will not be repeating itself, where Elena's concerned. Do you understand what I am saying?

Damon: Sure.

Stefan: Do you understand?

Damon: Whatever you say man, but, honestly, we're just friends. And as her friend I wasn't looking forward to telling her the truth anyway. So, I'll let you do it. Oh, and when you do tell Elena and if she needs a friend to talk to about anything I'm here for her.

****************************************************

Damon: I like you better like this. The period look didn't suit you.

Elena: Is that an insult?

Damon: Actually, Elena, it is a compliment of the highest order.

Elena: Look, I know Stefan is worried about our friendship.

Damon: Did he mention something to you, to?

Elena: No. Did he mention something to you?

Damon: No. Nothing worth repeating.

Elena: So, I think you should stop with the flirty little comments and that eye thing that you do.

Damon: *Does the eye thing* What eye thing?

Elena: Don't make me regret being your friend.

****************************************************

[Stephan_]

True Blood

Pam: Now, I don't remember telling you lavender was my favorite color.
Sookie: I'm in no mood for lesbian wierdness tonight, Pam

Gotta Love Pam!

[♡ Salena♡]

^I met Pam (Kristen) She's like the sweetest person ever!